This week's random rhymes for current times

Putting on the Doggerel: Ted Stevens, the WASL, Ken Burns, and Jane Hague.

Ken Burns. (PBS)

Ken Burns. (PBS)

Former Veco CEO Bill Allen has testified that his employees worked on Sen. Ted Stevens' extensive house remodel. Allen has admitted giving $400,000 in bribes.

Raise High the Roof Beam, Suckers

Up in south Alaska,
where rich folks like to play,
Ted Stevens has a disasta
that will not go away.

Ted found himself in clover,
not like us other fools,
when the Veco boys came over,
and brought along their tools.

They hammered, sawed, and drilled
at the Stevens domicile.
And instead of being billed,
Ted paid them with a smile.

The Dems are very glad
about what Teddy's mired in.
They think his big new pad
is where he's best retired in.


Superintendent of Public Instruction Terry Bergerson has been accused of leaving 5,547 students out of the WASL test statistics so that the Class of 2008's reading and writing scores look better.

The Class Responds

That the numbers were given a jostle
is not so completely impossil'.
It makes sense when one knows
that what really blows
is the math scores we got on the WASL.


Premiering Sunday, Sept. 23, on PBS, The War is a massively hyped documentary series from Ken "Civil War" Burns.

We've Been There Before, and We're Still There

Oh joy unbound! My cup brimmeth o'er!
Ken Burns is going to explain The War!
(That's World War II, not wars of yore.)
But haven't we seen all this before?
Victory At Sea first came ashore,
back in 1954,
and since then there've been 20 score:
Patton, Tora! Tora! Tor'!,
Combat, Dunkirk, The World at War.
Some cable channels are little more
than footage from the war galore.
So what does Kenny have in store?
He says he'll show a lot more gore,
as if we viewers are looking for
another bloody hardcore war.


King County Council member Jane Hague, recovering from the bad press involving her arrest for investigation of drunken driving, was subsequently accused of lying about having graduated from Western Michigan University.

Dear Jane

You should try that faux college pitch again,
only do a lot better than Michigan.
Claim Yale, then laugh,
and don't blame your staff,
which just makes you look like an unpleasant person again.


About the Author

Greg Palmer is a Seattle writer and television producer who has worked in media a long time. He's best know locally for his work as a features reporter, arts and entertainment critic, and humorist at KING-TV from 1977-1990. Since, Palmer has produced numerous public-television programs for PBS and KCTS-TV in Seattle, including Vaudeville: An American Masters Special and Death: The Trip of a Lifetime. You can reach him in care of editor@crosscut.com.

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Comments:

Posted Fri, Sep 21, 1:54 p.m. Inappropriate

"The Lion is the King of Beasts, and Husband to the Lioness...": G ~

Somewhere, Ogden Nash is smiling.

(Maybe Bennett Cerf, too.)

Posted Sat, Sep 22, 3:04 p.m. Inappropriate

Ken Burns: Nice poems, enjoyed them all.

However I think you might be dissing my slightly senior fellow alum (he may well have been a classmate of local financier Maud Smith-Daudon) contrary to your intentions.

Burn's political rootings are much closer to the 'People's History of the United States' than any other - he has chosen perhaps to take on seemingly droll subjects as the Brooklyn Bridge - but in doing so he has captured a left oriented perspective on the History of the US that is grounded, and hopefully, permanent.

The place of WW2 in history is still being emerging. Downplaying that, in any sense, is denigrating. Don't forget either that it was a Democrat that won us that victory. We can be sure that although Iraq, best case, may end up being a feather in our cap it will never compare with the future we promised the world in 1945.

That said, carry on, please.

-Douglas Tooley
Lincoln District, Tacoma

Posted Sun, Sep 23, 9:52 a.m. Inappropriate

AMBIVALENCE IS NO CRIME.: Ah, Ken Burns...an American Treasure.
How could he 'rouse Greg's poetic displeasure?
Nondenominational promotion, once seen as Burns' due,
is now merely "hype," an object of rue.
Greg's doggerel's barking. I'm feeling all mixy.
For who couldn't love the PBS Pixie?

Posted Sun, Sep 23, 12:06 p.m. Inappropriate

BURNS? I MAY HAVE HEARD OF HIM: I'll admit a bias where Ken Burns' THE WAR is concerned. I spent two years working on the previous PBS documentary series about World War Two, called THE PERILOUS FIGHT, a co-production of KCTS and two other companies that solely used color footage shot before and during the war. For the sound track, besides narration we used reportage from the era, and letters to and from combatants, including Burns' "discovery," Quentin Aanenson. After initial broadcast in 2003, it has since been rebroadcast around the world and more than a thousand times by PBS affiliates. It was and is a splendid series (thanks in small part to me, and very large part to others, especially Martin Smith, our leader on the project), produced with a small fraction of Burns' budget. In fact, I would guess we spent far less than half the money to produce the four hour-long shows than PBS has spent just promoting THE WAR. So to have endured the past three or four months, hearing that PBS was finally going to explain the war to us as only Ken Burns can, has been irritating, to say the least. Especially since I got an e-mail from Judy Littoff, who was an advisor on PERILOUS FIGHT and is an acknowledged expert on the war and the role of women in it. Some months ago her college invited Burns to come speak, the Eminent Historian promoting his latest work. Judy sat next to him at dinner, and in their conversation asked him if he had ever watched PERILOUS FIGHT. He answered that "He thought that he may have heard of it and that he never viewed films on topics that he was working on." And Judy, to her credit, said "I thought you were an historian," and pointed out that any competent historian researches previous work on the subject. His subsequent speech, she wrote me, was full of how Ken had "discovered" that the war was fought by everyday people and he was going to show that for the first time.
I thought forcing 18 hours of Ken Burns' BASEBALL on PBS and then the public was the peak of arrogance, but it was nothing compared to Burns presenting himself, with PBS' apparently eager involvement, as THE insightful chronicler of World War Two. That conflict has been the subject of a thousand previous programs, including one of the best documentary series ever made, THE WORLD AT WAR (1974), on which Martin Smith was one of the directors. These previous works cover the political spectrum–Burns is hardly the first liberal to look at the war. And if he really has never seen PERILOUS FIGHT but just "may have heard of it," I could almost guarantee you some of his staff have seen it and taken notes, because–as recently pointed out in the New Yorker–he uses a lot of the same footage we did, cut the same way.
I'm certainly not saying that the subject of World War Two has been done enough and no further work is necessary, (although one might ask why PBS, the network allegedly dedicated to bringing us programming on subjects other broadcasters ignore, needs to cover it so expansively. Have they heard of the History Channel?) For one thing, we learned four years ago that 3,000 World War Two veterans die every month, and so anything–including THE WAR–that gets the first-person story of these men and women recorded and out there before it is too late is worth the effort. But did it have to be done with such overblown hype, with such ignorance of previous work, with such arrogance? Did it have to be a glorious demonstration, not of the courage and sacrifice of the men and women of The War, but of the Power of Burns?
GPalmer

Posted Sun, Sep 23, 6:26 p.m. Inappropriate

RE: BURNS? I MAY HAVE HEARD OF HIM: Hey Palmer!

I've been a Ken Burns fan a long while, and I had originally intended to write some clever doggerel in response to your Homeric verse, but after reading how tender the subject of Burns and his WW II program is with you, I thought better of it.

His Civil War mini-series is an excellent tutorial on the conflict that still defines us as a nation. Perhaps because I've been a Civil War buff a long time and have a personal connection - my great-grandfather, Pvt. Albert Roberts, served as a member of the 20th Maine under Col. Josua Lawrence Chamberlain, and helped fend off the 2nd Alabama from behind a low stone wall on Little Round Top - I thoroughly enjoyed, and re-enjoy, that program.

And because I'm a fan, I also enjoyed his baseball mini-series.

Ever since I heard about his WW II program, I've been looking forward to it. You're right: given how many of the Greatest Generation die each month, there's no such thing as too much.

But I'll absolutely take your word about your program and Burns'...ignorance...thereof. Your story is living proof that there is no justice this side of heaven. I have no doubt that Burns both trades on his notoriety and jacks up his rate as a result.

So...my question to you...how does one with a real passion for this stuff get hold of Perilous Fight in order to get the straight skinny? Really...I'd love to see your, and your colleagues', work. Where is it available?

When I read my daily paper, I never miss the obits, and I specifically look for ones that mention service during WW II. I'm fascinated by how these extrordinary men (and some women) did what they did then came home to live ordinary lives.

It's also my hope that eventually we'll watch similar programming about Korean War and Viet Nam vets and, some day probably after you and I are long gone, aged Desert Storm, Operation Iraqi Freedom, and Operation Enduring Freedom (Afghanistan) vets such as my sons.

We owe them all more than we'll ever be able to pay.

Keep up the good fight!

The Piper

Posted Sun, Sep 23, 6:36 p.m. Inappropriate

RE: BURNS? I MAY HAVE HEARD OF HIM: Forgot to mention...The World at War is a fantastic series, but then again it was produced by the Brits. One thing that made it fascinating to me is the opportunity to see some of the still surviving key actors in the drama as well as a legitimate WW II combat vet like Jimmy Stewart who flew B-17's.

I also remember a 1964 documentary on CBS where Walter Cronkite and Ike toured the Normandy Beach (Ike drove the Jeep with Walter an obviously nervous passenger) with Ike recounting the events of June 6, 1944.

Sadly, now days what passes for such programming on TV news is all O.J. all the time.

The Piper

Posted Sun, Sep 23, 9:33 p.m. Inappropriate

Let it all out.: Good to have your full views, Greg. Can't get that stuff to rhyme, can you? Ultimately, PBS and all the KCTSes must have a Big Fall Pledge Vehicle. And Ken hadn't done His War. Ken has the responsibility to give the PBS its one promotion vehicle for pledge month(s). Ken's bankable. It's show business, after all. Nobody else on PBS can get promotion from all the commercial nets' promotion-vehicle shows. Of course, you, of all of us, know this best. Doesn't make it go down any easier, however. Take deep breaths.

Posted Mon, Sep 24, 6:52 a.m. Inappropriate

WHAT DOES AN 800 LB PIXIE DO? ANYTHING HE WANTS: PERILOUS FIGHT DVDs can be bought on line (or I suspect in person, in the KCTS lobby, 5th and Mercer) through the Channel Nine Store, www.kcts.org, for $25. Or in the same place you can get KEN'S WAR, book and DVD, for $150, which I believe is the "save $30" order-in-advance price.
Know how much Ken made personally on THE CIVIL WAR book and other effluvia? More than Grant.
GPalmer

Posted Wed, Sep 26, 12:17 p.m. Inappropriate

Sons of America: It also wouldn't be a bad idea to honor the Iraqi and Afghani vets when they return - at least not so much as to spoil 'em.

Certainly the next spurt of Tacoma's future will be largely shaped by these indivduals and their experiences. Apartment dwelling meth heads with pit bulls take note....

-Douglas Tooley
Lincoln District, Tacoma

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