Barack Obama was in town last night. He did two gigs for the hip at $100 and $250 a head, and one for the rich, in the Highlands, at $2,300 per. I attended the latter. I support Barak because he:

• Did his undergraduate at Columbia.
• Did his graduate work at Harvard.
• Is left handed.

Had he been born in Orange, N.J., as was I, he would exhibit the four marks of a great person. I am always surprised at people I see in Seattle at high-ticket Democratic events. It's like being a Zoroastrian and discovering that two people on your block are also fire worshipers. My next-door neighbor, one of three sponsors for the event, did not bother to invite me. "You're such a jerk," she explained, "I was sure you were a Republican." Barack performed well. His is cool. Way cool. I envy him. When I was 16, I spent 10 hours a day trying to be cool. The goals of mature adults – a well-kept lawn, ungrateful children, and a good dental plan – never rivaled the option of being "cool." I matured in college, aspiring to be a "hot shit" in addition to "cool." The work was the same, but the hours were worse. "Hot shit" was a grueling 24/7 job. I envy Barack, but Barack probably envies me. As previously noted, he was not born in Orange, N.J. So I, and 100-plus Seattleites, wrote a check to someone who would raise our taxes – perhaps to feel smugly superior, or perhaps to make a difference. I've been disappointed before. Ford, George H.W. Bush, Reagan, and Clinton were all left-handed. But so was Al Gore. After hearing Obama last night, I doubt I will be disappointed again.