The plague of the jocks

And they went to the High Priestess, and beseeched her to prevent the lesser players of basketball from journeying into the wilderness. And amongst the plaintiffs was one Sherman, the Poet, who said unto the High Priest: "We beseech thee to prevent our players of basketball from journeying to foreign lands. For unto us, the players of basketball are as Greek gods."

At this, the clouds parted, and a bright light shone from the Heavens. And the bright light produced a Very Deep Voice which said: "Greek Gods! What hath been wrought upon the Land of Sasquatch?"

And the Very Deep Voice became deeper still, and said: "Verily I say unto you, people of Sasquatch: Get thee a life."