Humor: Hansen's Arena runs into the diversity meter

The Seattle City Council has come up with a killer app for evaluating the NBA proposal.

Chris Hansen, left, with Mayor Mike McGinn during a press event.

Office of the Mayor/Flickr

Chris Hansen, left, with Mayor Mike McGinn during a press event.

Chris Hansen’s proposal to build a new NBA arena in SoDo faces a new obstacle — diversity. Charging that the NBA does little to encourage diversity, the Seattle City Council has demanded any professional basketball team moving to Seattle file an affirmative action plan to promote and increase diversity within its workforce.

Councilperson Nick Licata, the resolution’s sponsor, stated that increased diversity would enhance both social justice and the performance of a Seattle NBA team.

“Diversity gives a competitive edge to any organization,” he stated. “Diversity coalesces different talents using different sets of skills to work towards a common goal.  This ignites employee loyalty and increases productivity.

“With diversity many more solutions will arise as every individual contributes his unique cognitive, operating, and problem-solving skills. The enhanced communications encourage new attitudes and processes that profit the whole team.” Licata's remarks drew a standing ovation.

At a council hearing, the resolution was enthusiastically endorsed by representatives of the University Club, St. Mark's Episcopal Cathedral, Seattle Golf Club, Sunset Club, Seattle Tennis Club, and the Daughters of the American Revolution.

The resolution will also apply to any NHL hockey team and specificially prohibits discrimination against the toothful.


Topics: Sports

About the Author

Steve Clifford writes humor for Crosscut. He is the author of the recently published political satire, Fools and Knaves. In his unhumorous life, he was CEO of King Broadcasting and once played a role in saving New York City from bankruptcy.

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Comments:

Posted Fri, Aug 10, 7:50 a.m. Inappropriate

Weak, very weak.

Posted Fri, Aug 10, 8:34 a.m. Inappropriate

What the heck: "specificially prohibits discrimination against the toothful."?

mbrenman

Posted Fri, Aug 10, 9:15 a.m. Inappropriate

Well, guess we're not getting an NHL team.

Jon Sayer

Posted Fri, Aug 10, 10:06 a.m. Inappropriate

Suppose we did mandate diversity on professional sports teams. Think the level of play would go up or down?

BlueLight

Posted Fri, Aug 10, 11:54 a.m. Inappropriate

The list of representative attendees at the Council hearing (which I presume is a joke) is most humorous part of the article.

Posted Sun, Aug 12, 6:40 a.m. Inappropriate

How about Crosscut begins to support some real diversity by printing someone who can write humor.

Cameron

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