Top of the News

Chosen and ranked by Crosscut editors. Click date for previous days.

Mouse over headline for description.

more top of the news

Advertisement

Advertisement

White House »

May 11, 2008 6:00 PM | last updated May 13, 2008 3:55 PM
Hillary Clinton.
Advertisement
Advertisement

Hillary Clinton, will you please go now!

Flip Side: With apologies to Dr. Seuss and Maureen Dowd.

By Steve Clifford

Hillary Clinton will you please go now!
The time has come.
The time has come.
The time is now.
Just go.
Go.
Go!
I don't care how.
Hillary Clinton please go away!
Take a gas tax holiday
In your Zumble-Zay.
You can go by Troopergate.
You can go obliterate.
You can go triangulate.
Please, Hillary, accept your fate. Return to the Empire State.
Please go.
Please.
I don’t care how.
Go on a bucking bronc.
Go as a policy wonk.
Go as a gun totin’ gal.
Go as the working man’s pal.
Go as a bowler and a drinker
Go as a brawler and a stinker
I don’t care
If you
Go in a Whitewater canoe.
Just go, go, GO!
Please do, do, do, DO!
You can go by Giraffe
You can go by calf
Take your artificial laugh
And your spontaneity staff
I don’t care.
Go with Paula
Go with Monica
Go with Gennifer with a G
Take anyone, as long as you flee.
Hillary Clinton
Don't you know
The time has come
To go, go, GO!
You can go on
A flying mouse
You can go on
On a spruce grouse
You can dump the louse
And go an aggrieved spouse
Just leave our house
You can go by tryke
Or maybe hitch hike
If you like
You can go to Germany and proclaim the fourth Reich.
I don't care how.
Hillary Clinton
Will you please
GO NOW!
You can go in a pastry cart
Rejoin the board of Wal-Mart
Reaffirm your oddities
And trade commodities
Just depart.
Go on an anti-flag burning crusade.
Raise tariffs and restrain trade.
But GO, GO, GO.
End this charade.
Please Hillary!
Feel our pain.
Don’t remain.
Get on your way!
This very day.
Take you Rose billing file.
Take your practiced smile.
Take your Bosnian Snipers.
Take your campaign vipers.
You can go by Travelgate
... or private jet.
I don't care how you go.
Just get!
Hillary Clinton!
I don't care how.
Hillary Clinton
Will you please
GO NOW!
I said
GO
And
GO
I prayed ...
The time had come
But ...
Hillary STAYED.

  • Steve Clifford writes humor for Crosscut. In his unhumorous life, he was CEO of King Broadcasting and once played a role in saving New York City from bankruptcy.
Comments
Not Clifford again!
Report a violationPosted by: Cameron on May 11, 2008 9:06 PM
Editor's Pick Clifford is suppose to write with humor
but it turns out to be an ugly rumor
telling Hillary when to go
is two lines at best
the rest is for show, not for jest
So take a tip from your Uncle Cameron
Brevity is the soul of wit when you're do'in the hammer'in.
the Bard, not Cameron
Report a violationPosted by: dericjones@yahoo.com on May 14, 2008 10:42 AM
Uncle Cameron. Fun play here, but it's really not for you (or anyone) to appropriate Shakespeare as his own. "Brevity is the soul of wit" is a line offered by the uber-blustery Polonius in Shakespeare's longest play, "Hamlet." You'd do well to tune your sense of irony closer to that of the Bard and to be tolerant of Mr. Clifford for stretching his writing style here. His column certainly more interesting than so much of the other dreck accumulating in the dark corners of some other media websites.
shakespeare or not; an emotional feeling let loose
Report a violationPosted by: kvet on May 14, 2008 10:15 PM
So some of us rant and rave when we get strong feelings. So, i think maybe Mr. Clifford should have done most of that with his gal friend rather than in a blog on line, although some of it seemed to ryme. I do not believe Hilary; in that she says, if we vote/support her she; will help you. I think she lies. I do not trust or believe her. I doubt she would help me in my personel dilemna at all. I think she should drop out- ---, and would Barrack help my own problem? Doubt it, but he might be a better canditate than a several timed scorned female.
Norm Dicks has backed Hilary and I so far find the Honorable Mr., Dicks unsatisfactory in helping this constituent.
Advertisement
Advertisement

Sign up for Crosscut's free weekday newsletter e-mail.
About Crosscut
Advertising Info
Crosscut's list of RSS feeds.

Advertisement

Advertisement

Advertisement


About Crosscut »
Crosscut Seattle is an online newspaper for the Pacific Northwest, including Washington, Oregon, Idaho, and British Columbia. It's a guide to local and regional news, a place to report and discuss news, and a platform for new tools to convey news.

• More about Crosscut

Contact Crosscut

Tools

Sign up for Crosscut's daily newsletter
About Crosscut
Advertising Info
Crosscut's list of RSS feeds.
Advertisement