This week's random rhymes for current times

Putting on the Doggerel: Ted Stevens, the WASL, Ken Burns, and Jane Hague.
Crosscut archive image.

Ken Burns. (PBS)

Putting on the Doggerel: Ted Stevens, the WASL, Ken Burns, and Jane Hague.

Former Veco CEO Bill Allen has testified that his employees worked on Sen. Ted Stevens' extensive house remodel. Allen has admitted giving $400,000 in bribes.

Raise High the Roof Beam, Suckers

Up in south Alaska,
where rich folks like to play,
Ted Stevens has a disasta
that will not go away.

Ted found himself in clover,
not like us other fools,
when the Veco boys came over,
and brought along their tools.

They hammered, sawed, and drilled
at the Stevens domicile.
And instead of being billed,
Ted paid them with a smile.

The Dems are very glad
about what Teddy's mired in.
They think his big new pad
is where he's best retired in.

Superintendent of Public Instruction Terry Bergerson has been accused of leaving 5,547 students out of the WASL test statistics so that the Class of 2008's reading and writing scores look better.

The Class Responds

That the numbers were given a jostle
is not so completely impossil'.
It makes sense when one knows
that what really blows
is the math scores we got on the WASL.

Premiering Sunday, Sept. 23, on PBS, The War is a massively hyped documentary series from Ken "Civil War" Burns.

We've Been There Before, and We're Still There

Oh joy unbound! My cup brimmeth o'er!
Ken Burns is going to explain The War!
(That's World War II, not wars of yore.)
But haven't we seen all this before?
Victory At Sea first came ashore,
back in 1954,
and since then there've been 20 score:
Patton, Tora! Tora! Tor'!,
Combat, Dunkirk, The World at War.
Some cable channels are little more
than footage from the war galore.
So what does Kenny have in store?
He says he'll show a lot more gore,
as if we viewers are looking for
another bloody hardcore war.

King County Council member Jane Hague, recovering from the bad press involving her arrest for investigation of drunken driving, was subsequently accused of lying about having graduated from Western Michigan University.

Dear Jane

You should try that faux college pitch again,
only do a lot better than Michigan.
Claim Yale, then laugh,
and don't blame your staff,
which just makes you look like an unpleasant person again.


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