Seattle Mayor for Life Greg Nickels is issuing press releases fast and furiously. There are, after all, only 546 days until the election — the 2009 election. And although he has no real opponent as yet, His Excellency has only $129,639.98 in the bank for the 2009 campaign and only took in $29,430.90 in March — and hired fundraiser Colby Underwood got $3,500 of that.
So it's no wonder Nickels' staff is cranking out press releases that attach his name to everything that happens in this town. In March, while he was raising that $29,430.90, the official office of the mayor issued 24 press releases, and all but three began like this: "Mayor Greg Nickels ..." Etc., etc.
- "Mayor Greg Nickels announced today the city of Seattle will participate in Earth Hour ..."
- "Mayor Greg Nickels announced today that Seattle set a new city record for recycling rates ..."
- And our all-time favorite: "Mayor Greg Nickels today declared open season on potholes ..."
Here's a dubious one from April: "Mayor Greg Nickels announced today that the Seattle Channel garnered a record 17 Emmy nominations ..." Way to go, Mayor Nickels!
SEATTLE – Mayor Greg Nickels today announced the lineup of entertainers who have received permits to perform in downtown parks this month.
The Center City Busker Program is part of Nickels' Center City strategy for making downtown parks livelier and more welcoming with musicians, dancers, and other street performers.
"Bringing music to our parks is just one way we're making Seattle's open spaces even better," said Nickels. "It's all part of making our parks safer, cleaner and more engaging to the thousands of people who live and visit downtown."
And so on.
As long as he's sort of taking credit for things like issuing permits and Emmy nominations, maybe there are some other things he should sort of take credit for:
- "Seattle Mayor Greg Nickels today announced that buses from the University District to downtown will again be crowded with the homeless and annoying mentally ill people ..."
- "Seattle Mayor Greg Nickels today announced that the gaping, publicly owned hole in the ground in front of City Hall will continue to be a gaping, publicly owned hole until a private developer can be found to build something hideous ..."
- "Seattle Mayor Greg Nickels conceded today that despite his efforts, climate change continues unabated ..."
- "Seattle Mayor Greg Nickels today announced Seattle is now self-sustaining and doesn't need the rest of the state ..."
Oops, OK, that last one is kind of true.